The ‘You Are A Pirate’ Song

less video games. less television. more books.

ironically, i think books are just a means to and end; the end being i get to go wander around book stores. little book stores are my favorite, but they’re only good for like one go. what really lights my fire is borders (and recently barnes and noble because it’s something different). it’s big enough that i can wander through the different sections and find something to just pull off the shelf and sit down with it. you know that guy that you see just sitting there reading and you always think to yourself why the heck doesn’t he just buy that damn book and take it home?!? yeah, i’m that guy.

Her: “Well, I’m dating my best friend but I don’t think I really love him.”

1a) boy talks about breaking up with girl, saying “it’s just not working any more”
1b) best friend /switzerlands and stays neutral, suggests “you need to do what you think is best.”
2a) boy breaks up with girl, citing multitude of reasons/excuses
2b) best friend /switzerlands and stays neutral but supportive, quotes the bitter/sweet speech from vanilla sky
3a) boy talks about getting back together with girl, saying “we’re not going out. just hanging out.”
3b) best friend clearly expresses both disappointment and agitation, suggests “you’re an idiot.”

you did it and you cant undo it. all that you’re going to accomplish is exacerbating the situation and make things worse. yeah, you’re bored and lonely and depressed, but you lie in the bed that you make. and i’m going to tell you how dumb you are every time you bring it up… because you are.

And I found this gem: 12 “Christian” Beliefs That Can Drive You Crazy

Book Description:
This book helps people understand twelve common false assumptions about Christianity that cripple their faith.

From the Back Cover:
Not everything believed a biblical truth is truly biblical. The authors debunk 12 commonly accepted beliefs that cause bondage rather than liberty. They explain how nuggets of truth become cornerstones for error when wrongly understood, and they help build solid scriptural foundations that produce emotional freedom. Now with discussion guide.

The 12 Beliefs:
1. It’s selfish to have my needs met.
2. If I’m spiritual enough, I will have no pain or sinfulness.
3. If I change my behavior, I will grow spiritually
4. I just need to give it to the Lord.
5. One day, I’ll be finished with recovery.
6. Leave the past behind.
7. If I have God, I don’t need people
8. ‘Shoulds’ are good.
9. Guilt and shame are good for me .
10. If I make right choices, I will grow spiritually.
11. Just doing the right thing is more important than why I do it.
12. If I know the truth, I will grow.

And then I giggled, ’cause yep.. that’s about right.

There was a shopping list by the front door written in pink pen:
Shampoo
Cream
3×5 Cards

I think it might have been written on the back of a receipt.

There are all sorts of things like this left in his (previously their?) apartment. Small reminders that hey, she’s not here anymore. Which is kind of sad because I really liked her.

Being supportive of irrational decisions is a chore but I do it anyway… which brings me back to a question I don’t think I’ll ever be able to answer: Does doing it make me a good or bad person? I’m starting to think that maybe the answer just depends on the day of the week.

Everybody’s always in favor of saving Hitler’s brain, but once you put it in the body of a great white shark, oooh, suddenly you’ve gone too far!”
- Hubert J. Farnsworth, Futurama

This isn’t life, it’s just stuff.

- Lester Burnham, American Beauty

1) Internet Explorer
2) Horoscopes
3) Druids
4) Long Division
5) Christmas Shopping
6) Snow Drifts
7) Crazy Girls
8) Facebook
9) The movie Van Helsing
10) Old men

one of the advantages to sleeping on a couch in the living room is that my laptop is within arms reach. so when i wake up from a dream about how i’m on a date with a girl and we’re drawing on the back of our placemats with crayons, i can quickly google “quotes crayons girl” and find a gem like this.

“Life is like a box of crayons. Most people are the 8-color boxes, but what you’re really looking for are the 64-color boxes with the sharpeners on the back. I fancy myself to be a 64-color box, though I’ve got a few missing. It’s ok though, because I’ve got some more vibrant colors like periwinkle at my disposal. I have a bit of a problem though in that I can only meet the 8-color boxes. Does anyone else have that problem? I mean there are so many different colors of life, of feeling, of articulation.. so when I meet someone who’s an 8-color type.. I’m like, “hey girl, magenta!” and she’s like, “oh, you mean purple!” and she goes off on her purple thing, and I’m like, “no - I want magenta!””

- John Mayer

so true, john. so true.

Doakes: its due tomorrow but im working with my lab partner
Kraft110: so tell your lab partner your grandma fell down the stairs and broke her hip and you have to go
Kraft110: here, i’ll write you a script
Kraft110: fyi: the capslock isn’t emphasis, so don’t yell- i’m just too lazy to use quotation marks and i think you’re too stupid to notice them so everything that you need to say is in caps
Doakes: fuck you
Kraft110: OH, I WONDER WHOS CALLING MY PHONE (you pull your phone out of your pocket and answer it) OH, HI GRANDMA! HOW ARE YOU? (pause for a 5 or 6 seconds- like the length of time it takes you to masturbate) WHAT? YOU’VE FALLEN DOWN AND YOU CAN’T GET UP? DON’T WORRY GRANDMA, I’M COMING- JUST STAY RIGHT THERE BALLED UP IN THE FETAL POSITION NEXT TO THE KITCHEN TABLE AND I’LL BE OVER IN 15 OR TWENTY MINUTES DEPENDING ON TRAFFIC! I LOVE YOU GRANDMA!
Doakes: dont have my phone with me
Kraft110: if you don’t have your phone just fake it with your hand
Kraft110: your lab partner will be too caught up in the tragic events occurring at grandma’s to even notice
Doakes: lol
Doakes: im not a terrible person so i cant
Doakes: well, i sort of am. but not that terrible
Kraft110: you are that terrible
Kraft110: you’re just not that prepared